i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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