Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
