I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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