At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
