Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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