im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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