she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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