i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize
