Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
