My room smells like vodka and shame
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
