So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
