Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
