remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
