who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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