He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
