I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
