i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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