so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
