nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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