Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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