You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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