Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
