11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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