But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize