The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
