I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
