Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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