in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
