So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
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