How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
