If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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