but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
