We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Still dying that you shit outside
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
