...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
