im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
