please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
