he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
