so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
