We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
