All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
