I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
