another moral hangover. fuck.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
