you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
