Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize