if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
My vagina just recognized that song.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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