im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
