The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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