How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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