eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
