I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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