it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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