So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
