you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
